Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Snow in October?

And what are the chances of classes being canceled? Slim to none.

Guess it really is time to bring the plants inside...

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Burn-out and Dissatisfaction

I've been reading this girl's blog online because she writes in an entertaining way about her life, which is very different from my own. I worked with this girl for a semester at the student newspaper about four years ago. I haven't really talked to her or hung out with her since then. She graduated a semester early like I did, but unlike me, she landed a high paying job immediately after college and owns a condo in Dupont Circle. She's two years younger than me and OWNS an apartment. Unlike me she waited to get pets until after she could afford the vet bills. She can afford to go shopping for new clothes. I can't even pay my rent or any other bill for that matter on time; I'm still waiting on my loan to come in. Yet with all the money she has and a live-in boyfriend she complains that her work isn't challenging enough and that her job somehow goes against her value system. She'd rather teach group fitness classes than consult.

I had heard about this kind of thing before I graduated from college, having friends or acquaintences who take whatever is the highest paying job that they can get after college and then feel unsatisfied. I have been in school for almost six years and will come out with two B.A.s feeling poor and burnt out. I still have no idea why I've gone to school for so long only to graduate without an advanced degree...well I mean I know that part of it was a professor discouraging me from applying to a creative writing program, and part of it was me not wanting an advanced English degree because I HATE theory, and of course I was too lazy to take the GREs. Still, I'm incredibly burnt out with a double time case of senoritis.

I had another professor who once told me that the first few years right after college graduation are the hardest, figuring out who your friends are or making new friends if you've moved, trying to figure out who you are and what you want, just generally feeling lonely..."It doesn't really get easier until you're in your 30s," she had said, but it was the "HARDEST around 23-25". Something to look forward to.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Feeling sick...

I'm feeling kind of down and out because I've been sick all weekend. I have to turn in an essay in Spanish on Pan's Labyrinth and then right afterward I have to attend a meeting for the student committee. It's the first one of the year and it's stressing me out a little because even though I had asked for the food awhile ago nothing was ordered. Tonight I have to order sandwiches and salad and get them to the room before the meeting ends, which is a challenge because delivery guys tend to be completely confused by the campus setup.

I'm feeling bleh and incredibly jealous of an old friend of mine who seems to literally have it all but complains anyway. She has an incredibly well-paying job, owns a condo in DC in a very nice neighborhood, has time to exercise (which I do not), and can afford trips to California (while I cannot even pay my rent on time). Yet, she complains about not feeling challenged at her job and being "bored" at work.

Maybe, I just need to do more things for myself that I used to like doing. The issue is that here in NJ without a car, it is incredibly difficult. Cabs are expensive and there's no real system of public transportation in my town. Plus I don't have time. I'm carrying 15 credits this semester and working. Even with cutting down my work hours, doing both is still kicking my ass. I tend to get up 7 am and run around nonstop until 8 or 9 pm.

Maybe, if I just could find time to read books or go into NYC. But, I don't even have time to figure out what to do once I'm there...